How to be me

This was a genuine Eureka! Moment, in that it was a new realization that came to me while having a bath. At the time I was re-reading the essay Real Naturalism in Galen Strawson's Things That Bother Me. Strawson's essay draws the conclusion that any account of reality has to include an account of experience. Experience, or consciousness, is the only thing we can absolutely conclude is real. The universe it enables us to apprehend may be an illusion, but the fact that we experience is not. Current science tries, usually with great success, to account for reality within the bounds of the four dimensions of space and time. Yet within spacetime nobody has so far managed to discover the place where consciousness, or experience, occurs. They can maybe point to events in spacetime inside the human brain that correlate to experience being had, but they cannot account for what any being who has experiences knows experiences to be - by way of being the being who experiences them.  There

[I don't really feel confident that I have bottomed out all my arguments here, particularly around gender and sex. But I am sharing this in the hope that comments, either public or private, will help me do so.] Early in my post-2020 reading of BLM literature I came across how whites use "divide and rule" to maintain systems that provide whites with material benefits while denying those benefits to non-whites. I bristled at this, thinking "I am white and I don't use divide and rule". Since then I have learnt much that enables me to examine divide and rule without bristling. And now I see it in operation all around me - not necessarily dividing whites and non-whites but generally dividing people who have more in common than these externally imposed divisions allow. I think part of my bristling may have come from thinking that even where the consequence of some action might be to divide and rule, that was maybe not the consequence intended by the (usually white